Wedding Rehearsals

Tonight I will be leading a wedding rehearsal. I stopped counting how many weddings and rehearsals I’ve been at long ago, I am sure this is around my 475,985 rehearsal (or it just seems like that).

Wedding rehearsals are kind of fun. There is a nervous energy in the air. Everyone is getting ready for the big day; and when the dry run is over you get to eat. As the name suggests a rehearsal is a practice. It’s the time to work out the bugs. So by definition things aren’t always perfect at rehearsals. There are a few things that you can count on:

• Someone will be late.
• The bow-on-a-paper-plate bouquet that the bride carries down the aisle is half tacky; half terrific!
• If the Mother of the Bride (The MOTB) isn’t happy; ain’t nobody happy.
• If the Father of the Bride (the FOTB) looks broke; he is.
• If the Mother of the Groom (The MOTG) looks like she is about to lose something and gain something; she is.
• If the MOTB is blubbering away during the rehearsal make sure there are two boxes of tissue on her pew during the wedding.
• The flower girl will walk down the aisle flawlessly one time-- and one time only. It will either happen at the rehearsal or during the actual ceremony—but never both. Never. So if she walks down the aisle like an angel during the practice then beware during the real deal.
• If the ring bearer is under 3 years old, chances are Barnum and Bailey’s grizzly bear would have a better chance to bring the rings forward without turning the wedding into a circus than the toddler.
• No matter how much duct tape you put on the floor to remind the groomsmen exactly where to stand, they will find themselves in the wrong spot during the ceremony.
• There is at least one bridesmaid that should not be wearing the chiffon dress that the bride has picked for the ladies to wear.
• Twenty-two years ago, when I first started officiating weddings the groomsmen had tattoos and the bridesmaids had earrings; that fashion statement has been reversed—weird.
• No amount of reminding the Maid of Honor not to worry about the wedding gown’s train will keep her from adjusting it at least three times on the wedding day.
• Even if the wedding singer has sung the wedding song a bazillion times, he or she will still want to sing their song a bazillion and oneth time at the rehearsal with the microphone.
• If the soon-to-be-bride punches the groom during the rehearsal, that’s probably an indicator the wedding should be rethought (I had a ring side seat for that one.)
• Every soon-to-be-groom wants to practice the kiss (not sure about the groom that got punched).
• If the following people are invited to the rehearsal dinner: the minister, the grandparents of the bride and the fraternity brothers of the groom -- avoid having the frat boys offer a toast during the meal. (Two words: Awk Ward!)

There’s a lot of planning that goes into making the wedding day perfect. I pray that we put as much effort into making our marriages perfect. Much more than one good day; marriages are meant to last forever. With God’s help they can—it’s putting Him first and the couple moving forward through life hand in hand trusting God all the way. That’s my prayer for tonight’s couple; and my prayer for all of our couples-- that we would live by Joshua’s words, “As for me and my house we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15)